The Peace Within

The quick answer:  Worried sick?  Kick the stress habit.
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A Cabin in the Woods

Way back in the ‘30s, my grandfather had the brilliant idea to build a cabin in the woods.  As a child, I loved its rough-sawn exterior and knotty pine interior.  To get to it you left the highway, crossed over a wooden bridge, and took a narrow dirt road through the forest.  The cabin had a large shady porch perfect for sitting and reading.  For 75 years that cabin—shown above—was a gathering place for our family.  Though our means were modest, our little cabin in the woods made us children feel rich as any king. 

My fondest childhood memories revolve around grandpa's cabin.  I've a memory of climbing upstairs to bed, a little afraid of the dark, and falling asleep as the flame from the kerosene lamp flickered on the walls.  I awoke to the morning sun shining through the trees and the reassuring sound and smell of a crackling fire.  The long night had passed into another delightful day at the cabin.

Life can be stressful, even for kids, but at our cabin I never felt anything but peace.  One key to health is to extend that peace into the spheres of our adult lives.  That's not easy, but definitely worth doing.

Stress

There may be shortages of some things in life, but there’s always enough stress to go around.  But stress, though a bit is necessary to get us moving in the morning, is toxic in excess.  Most of our Healthy Changes are about eating right, four support exercise, but just one addresses stress.  So, for your own good, please take some time to ponder this Healthy Change.

We discussed stress in a post last year.  We talked about Hans Selye (1907-1982) the doctor best known for linking chronic stress with disease.  We discussed the role chronic stress plays in premature aging (the meanest cut), cancer, and heart disease. The list goes on.

There’s a ratchet quality to stress—after a stress episode, we often don’t return to the relaxed state.  Rather there is a residue that remains so that in the next bout—and there’ll always be another episode—we’re driven to higher and higher levels of stress.  When caught in these chronic stress cycles, we take it as the new “normal.”  Like fish in water, we can be quite unaware of a toxic stress level. 

It's a measure of things gone awry that the Christmas Season—the time we celebrate the birth of Christ who offered a new form of peace—is the most stressful time of the year.  Do Christmas different—celebrate peacefully.

Finding Peace

The key is not to run faster but to step out of the stress cycle.   Here are seven ways:

1. Family: The supporting love of family can be a great comfort.  Who hasn’t come home from work, carrying all the troubles of the day on their shoulders, and found instant relief by getting down and wrestling with the kids?
2. Best friends:  A study of English children found being with their best friend gave the best relief from stress.  Cortisol, the stress hormone produced by the adrenal glands, was most effectively relieved for children by best friends.  Who’s your best friend?
3. Music: The beautiful wife saw a bumper sticker for the classical music station:  “Less stress, more Strauss.”
4. Exercise:  Strengthening the body helps it to relax and stimulates a similar process for the mind.
5. Worship:  Don’t you find, in the rhythm of church ritual, clarification of what’s really important?  Whatever your faith, the God who orders the universe knows your name and proffers His peace. 
6. Meditation:  Thinking more deeply about whatever troubles you can lead to new insights, and better paths to follow. 
7. Laugh:  Remember Ferris Bueller?  Life goes by pretty fast; if you don’t stop and have a little fun, you just might miss out

Please Comment:  Too much  stress for comfort?  Stess can be addictive but you can break the pattern.  Share your best stress reduction experiences.   Been worried sick?  It happens.  How do you get well?  Stress is one ailment where you can be your own best doctor.

Comments

[znc]

I discovered that when I am stressful or worrying about something,,gardening and baking helps me. It gets my mind off of things and relaxes me.

[Dee]

Coping with stress is definitely one of my weakest traits. I know I'm stressed when I wake up at night and can't go back to sleep back because my mind is going 100 mph. It is not fun!
What really helps me most is talking it through with someone...especially someone that can look at the issue/problem and shed positive light on it or just make it seem not as huge as I've built it up to be in my mind.

[Kristen]

Thank you for this post--it is lovely.
A good, long walk early in the morning works for me. And a long drive. All places to meditate, I suppose.

[Zane]

Great post at this time of year! I wonder if you've seen this TED talk on stress?

http://www.ted.com/talks/kelly_mcgonigal_how_to_make_stress_your_friend.html?utm_content=awesm-publisher&utm_medium=on.ted.com-static&utm_campaign=&utm_source=direct-on.ted.com&awesm=on.ted.com_UpsideOfStress

It is definitely worth 15 minutes of your time!

[melinda]

This post is lovely. It's a topic that's been on my mind quite a bit lately. Thanks!

[skip hellewell]

I followed Zanes suggestion and listened to the YouTube talk on stress by Kelly McGonigal, a Stanford health-psychologist. The point of the YouTube video was that how you feel about stress is central to the toxicity. So stress when you're fighting for something you believe in is not necessarily toxic, but stress that is imposed on you may be quite toxic. Think of a mother fighting for her child—that stress is OK, maybe even good. Then think of a postal worker who is powerless under a difficult boss—that's bad stress, thus the term "going postal."
McGonigal also discusses the good stress hormone "oxytocin" also called the "cuddle" or "trust" hormone for its ability to bond us to other people. Husbands give it to their wives when they give a nice long and affectionate hug. Mothers give it to their infants through breast milk. If you go to church and shake hands with people you care about, well you all get a nice oxytocin boost.
Best medicine: Take control of your troubles and be sure to get a daily hug.

[joy]

yes, yes, and yes! Thank you for inspiring thoughts and words.
-skipping back a few posts, have you ever heard of 'natural yeast?' I've been studying the book "Baking with Natural Yeast," and have adapted this method of bread making. Same principle as sourdough, but yields beautiful loaves of homemade bread! If you haven't already, check it out. Would love to know your thoughts...

[Becky]

I always appreciate the reminder to slow down, especially at this time of year. We gather all of the kids and read a Christmas book each night in December. It is a great way to reduce stress and reconnect as a family.

[Jane]

I suffer from the same kind of sleeplessness as a result of stress as Dee described. I agree with her that vocalizing our worries can help put them into better perspective. I'm grateful to people I can talk to who don't give advice but just listen and reassure. Some stressors can only really be solved by the passage of time and patience--and a friend can sure help.

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